Inside the mind of Martin Pickles

2000AD reader Martin Pickles' 5th place entry in the "Design a trap to kill Slaine" competition which ran in 2000AD Prog 462. By far the best of all the prize-winning entries, I can't believe it didn't win...

You sick fucker, Pickles!

Tithead!

Attention Johhny Alpha...

...You have a saggy breast on your head...

And it makes Tharg sad...

sad and a little angry.

Scan from 2000AD Sci-Fi Special 1987

Free Gifts!

That huge 2000AD collection I've just been given is incredible. All of the progs have been really well looked after, many have their free gifts attached, loads still have the promotional inserts. So I have the Dredd badge on Prog 300, sticker books for He-Man and Dune WITH unopened packets of stickers + a bunch of vintage Sinclair Spectrum promo inserts. Amazing stuff.

Want to know what's even more amazing?

This...

How do you like those white plastic vampire fang eggs, eh? That's right chums, stuffed at the bottom of one of the crates was one of THE holy grails of modern British comics, Scream #1 WITH free gift! I've mentioned this treasure briefly before, suffice to say it's rare. BUT, it wasn't the only extra included with this incredible haul. I also got this...

an issue of '80s fanzine Arken Sword, which as you can see sports a rather fine Brian Bolland Judge Dredd/American Flagg cover and includes rare interviews with Bolland, Alan Moore and Howard Chaykin. Awesome doesn't begin to describe it.

But wait...there's more! All the 2000AD summer specials going back to 1985! Those mint condition Dice Man comics I mentioned yesterday, the complete Ron Smith Daily Star strips, a couple of old Ninja Turtles comics, a Thunderbirds special from 1983 and some promo photos for Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade(?!).

I'm honestly overwhelmed by it all. Magic.

Thrill Power!

OK, remember last month when I was getting all excited about a stash of 2000AD hidden in an Islington attic?

Well they turned up today...

The bad news: No 1-70 (save a few random issues 15, 16, 17)

The good news: Progs 70 -700(!) pretty much all present and correct. Plus the complete Daily Star Dredd strips + some issues of Crisis + Diceman. All in NM condition.

Can't complain. More later.

Busy

On toddler duty!

Little Kid tipped me off to THIS LINK which is very good indeed!

I've also been laughing a lot at this...

Who said alcoholism wasn't funny?

Shopping List

Fuck my old boots, I'm knackered. Something to do with the fact that the police decided to have a helicopter party over my house at 3am. Fascists!

Anyway, I've been reading LOADS. Just finished up on the first Garth Ennis Hellblazer trade, Dangerous Habits which was an entertaining wheeze. As much as I love horror comics, they rarely give me the shivers, but Ennis' demons really were quite scary. The Devil playing at being Christ on the cross was an Exorcist-type moment. Great stuff. I'm keen to crack on with the next trade, Bloodlines, but see that it's out of print. Bugger. Quick hunt around the comic shops on Friday and thence to ebay I suppose.

I demolished the second volume of The Creepy Archives. Incredible! I'm eating this stuff up. Alright, so the stories are a bit clunky, but the art is off the scale. Angelo Torres is a god! He does some medieval European cityscapes in Volume Two that blew my comic socks off. I'm itching for more! Snagged a 10% discount voucher at The Book Depository which I used to order the remaining two volumes + the first two volumes of Eerie. This brings me up to speed on Dark Horse's Warren reprint schedule.

Also finished up Volume four of the Geoff Johns JSA trade run, Fair Play. Nice stuff. The first issues which Johns penned without the aid of Goyer or Robinson (I think). Features Roulette, a super-villainess who is DC's answer to Arcade, a baddie who was one of my absolute faves as a nipper.

On the single issue front, I've knocked off a big wadge of my backlog, but still have a mountain of stuff to catch up on. Oh well time to top up the pile with this week's shopping list...

Irredeemable #6

Final Crisis Aftermath Run #5

Mighty #8

Northlanders #20

Solomon Grundy #7

Supergirl Annual #1

Wednesday Comics #9

Chew #4, $2.99

Jersey Gods #7

Daring Mystery Comic #1

Exiles #6

Incognito #6

Invincible Iron Man #17

Mystic Comics #1

Drifting Classroom Vol 5

I loves me some new comics, but it is perhaps telling that I'm looking forward to a reprint of a 35-year-old manga book most of all. I'm also tempted to pick up the second trade of Jason Aaron's Ghost Rider and Iain Rankin's Hellblazer OGN, Dark Entires, but will probably hold off on both for a bit. Also out this week is Strange Tales #1, the much anticipated series where indie creators get to play with Marvel's big toys. I've been looking forward to this a lot, but it's a three issue series which will look much nicer as a collected hardback edition so I'm hanging on.

London Loves Spain!

¡Hola mis amigos españoles, recepción a Londres aman los tebeos! Espero que usted disfrute de mi charla aburrida sobre hombres en leotards.

which translates as : Hello my Spanish friendly, reception to London love the tebeos! I hope that you enjoy my char it boring on men in leotards.

which is nothing like the sentence I typed into Babelfish, but you get the idea.

Why am I pasting pidgin Spanish onto my blog? Well, yesterday I got linked by top Spanish comics blog Entre Comics, an event which has led to an overwhelming number of Latin hits.

None of these new found chums will hang around for long of course, but it was nice to see what real traffic looks like, if only for one day. And it did get me thinking...

From time to time, people have emailed me asking how to get people to read their blog based blathering, I've always replied that the question isn't important. And really it isn't, after all if I did this thing for readers I'd have packed it in yonks ago. Nope, I'm happy with the fact that six or seven people (three of whom I know personally) occasionally pitch up to check my shit.

I must admit though, on the glorious days where I've been linked by some monster of the comics glitterati, the influx of new people has made me a little jealous of those leading lights who regularly pull in thousands of readers a day.

It's a stupid state to get in. I mean, let's face facts, there are a gazillion comic blogs out there and the top ones, the ones that pull in the readers, are really professional looking, well written, informed pieces of brilliance. In other words, they get the traffic because they're good!

When I started writing this bilge, I had no idea that any of them even existed. I certainly didn't expect anyone but the one person I told about my blog to read it. I have neither the knowledge of comics, the craft with words or, since my son was born, the time to match the big boys at this game. I write this bilge on an (almost) daily basis, because I enjoy reading and wittering on about comics.

What am I trying to say? Fuck, I've forgotten. Oh yes: ahhem, fellow blogging chums, worry not about your hits. Comics blog fame is a cruel and elusive mistress. If like me, you feel the need to share your innermost thoughts on sequential art then do so. Just don't waste your time if the fact that no one is going to read it is likely to turn you off.

In reality the stuff you and I are writing isn't that interesting to anyone else but ourselves. Which is fine, there's nowt wrong with a bit of navel gazing. Pulling the metaphorical fluff out of your comics belly and waving it at the world is quite therapeutic really. Enjoy it, and don't worry that nobody else even notices.

There you go. Christ, that was dull wasn't it?

I promise NEVER to blog about blogging again.

Adios imaginary web chums, adios.