Tales from the nerd sack

I feel like I've spent a lot of time moaning about comics lately, which is a shame really because leaving aside the rising prices, frustrating delays and execrable Secret Invasion style crossover muddles, there are actually some damn fine books on the racks at the moment.

I admit that since the birth of my son I haven't had as much time to read them as I once did, but when I do manage to slip on the old smoking jacket and relax with my tottering To Read pile, I'm often amazed by the quality of some of the comics that are coming out.

Take the new Rick Remender book Gigantic, for example. Wow! What a fucking great read. Giant Robot ACCIDENTALLY attacks San Fransisco in a thrill packed blaze of exploding buses and toppling skyscrapers. What more do you want? Well, how about some sci-fi satire on our obsession with reality TV, a healthy smattering of evil aliens and a nice afterword from Remender himself?

Folks, this is a top comic. Perhaps the colour palette is a little too muted for such a fiery spectacular, but the art itself is excellent. Well worth a look, ESPECIALLY if you're the kind of person who makes this sort of thing for a living...



Yeah, if LLC chum Mr Wheatley doesn't like Gigantic, I'll eat my run of Rom!

Final Crisis: Resist is almost as good as Gigantic, particularly if you miss Greg Rucka's Checkmate. I've enjoyed all the tie-ins to Final Crisis, but as a fan of Checkmate, I have to say this is probably my favourite so far.

Story? Well, basically you've got a beefed up revamp of Snapper Carr teleporting around the world blowing up Darkseid's bases, shagging cat women and getting into post coital scrapes with Gorilla Grodd (Mmmm post coital scrapes). Meanwhile, back at the ranch, Mr Terrific figures out that to save the World from the Anti-Life equation he's going to have to sacrifice the woman he loves to free the Omac nanites in her body so that they in turn can release the latent Omac population of earth to do in Darkseid! Whew. I realise that this will make no sense to most people, but trust me, it's great.

As is The Unknown Soldier. Josh Dysart and Alberto Ponticelli's re imagining of the classic DC property is set against the bloody backdrop of Northern Uganda, where Moses Lwanga, a pacifist doctor working in the refugee camps of his wartorn country gets possessed by the spirit of the Unknown Soldier and finds himself compelled to turn to violence as a result.

Dysart went out to Uganda to research the comic, and his righteous anger at some of the atrocities being committed burns brightly in this story. Occasionally this works against him, as some of his characters sound like they're quoting statistics from a UN report rather than speaking their minds, but mostly it makes for an entertaining and informative read. Ponticelli's art is SENSATIONAL - bloody, sweaty, dusty and violent. His style reminds me of Eduardo Risso (of 100 bullets fame) and that's a big compliment.

Funnily enough Mario Alberti's art in X-Men and Spider-Man #1 has a similar feel to it, perhaps with a bit of Marcos Martin thrown if for good measure. Set in 60s Manhattan, this Christos Gage penned tale will probably draw comparisons with X-Men First Class. It's a light frothy take on the early days of Marvel, which I enjoyed a lot. Gage's script is snappy and fun, but the real star here is Alberti who captures the spirit of the 60s perfectly. He makes Gwen Stacey and Mary Jane look like groovy chicks and Peter Parker look like the slightly awkward (not quite ready to leave the 1950s) teenager that he originally was. It's beautiful stuff. Oh and he draws a mean Blob.

Last week's comics TODAY!

I missed new comic day last week, but on a trip to the West End with the missus to buy doormats and baby seats, I nicked five minutes in GOSH!

Really, I needn't have bothered. After all last week's shopping list was probably the shortest I've ever compiled. Seriously, I only picked up two comics for a total spend of £4. At least they were good comics. First in the old nerd sack was Northlanders #5: More Viking based tomfoolery and a nice preview of the forthcoming reboot of House of Mystery. House of Mystery was a firm favourite of mine as a kid, and I'd be delighted if this latest attempt to resurrect the old favourite worked out. With Bill Willingham scripting, it has a decent chance.

The other comic on my list was Checkmate #25. Greg Rucka's last. Boooooo! I doubt this title will last much longer without Rucka at the reins, which is a shame as he's done a great job of getting me excited about a relatively obscure corner of the DC Universe. Now that it's done, I might just have to go back and read all 25 issues again. Yes, it was that good.

This and that

As some of the more grizzled old hacks in my office say when they fancy a trip to the pub: "Much to discuss!"

So where to begin? Well, how about we take a look at what Mr Robert Kirkman has to say about the current state of the ultimate universe...

"I feel compelled to admit that I'm really enjoying ULTIMATE HUMAN. It's a series by Warren Ellis, Cary Nord and Dave Stewart. The art is superb and for a book that's really only about Iron Man and Hulk fighting--and done only to play off the two movies being released this year--it's really just written superbly. The characters are so well defined and well acted it's just a joy to watch Tony Stark and Bruce Banner react. I can only hope that after Jeph Loeb is done with THE ULTIMATES, Warren Ellis is given a shot on the book... he really does get the characters and the tone of the book. I recommend it to anyone who's not thrilled with Ultimates 3"

Now you may think it's pretty rich of Kirkman to be taking a swipe (all be it a veiled one) at Loeb's Ultimates when his own tenure on Ultimate X-Men has been such a let down, but he's right about Warren Ellis getting the tone of the Ultimates. I said so HERE!

If you want to read more of Kirkman's thoughts on comics and pop culture then I suggest you subscribe to his KIRKSPAM mailing list HERE

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Talking of Warren Ellis, the third part of his webcomic FREAKANGELS has just gone up. It's been interesting so far. Nice art and subdued colours from Paul Duffield too. I like the little rainbow in the water coming out of the hosepipe in this panel...

Very pretty.

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Finally got round to reading Crawl Space XXX Zombies #3 and errrm well, shit, I don't want to sound like Mary Whitehouse or anything but it was all rather nasty.

Zombie porn stars biting off cocks I can take, but splash pages of zombie nurses eating newborn babies!?! Whoa there! That's a step too far for my tastes, and one that felt out of place with the humour which ran so strongly through the first couple of issues.

Shame really as up until that point I'd been enjoying Crawl Space a lot. I won't be dropping it (hey I'm not that much of a prude) but I really hope we don't see any more baby munching in issue #4.

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I was tempted to give Kick-Ass a miss, but the lure of a new Mark Millar/John Romita JR. book sitting on the comic shop shelf was just to great to resist. And, you know, it's not half bad. As with most of Millar's work we're on familiar ground: the cult of instant celebrity, alienation, violence, sexual frustration etc etc. We've seen it all before in The Chosen, Wanted and The Ultimates.

As such, reading Kick-Ass you feel that Millar isn't really extending himself here. But, you know he still knows how to write a funny superhero comic even if he is basically writing the same one over and over again.

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Sad news re Checkmate; Marvel bound Greg Rucka is leaving as of issue #25.

I think it's safe to say that the book will be canceled soon after. Sales on the title are poor and DC were probably only keeping it going because binning it would have pissed Rucka off BIG TIME.

Whatever, I'd be shocked if it makes issue 40 now that Rucka's going, which is a bummer as it's one of the best books on the stand.

Boo-hoo.

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I've just realised, I've been writing this bollocks for over a year now. Ha Ha. I never thought I'd manage that when I sat down and spewed out a pissed rant about Ultimate X-Men.

I'm not sure why I'm still doing it given that the only people who seem to read it are blokes who accidentally stumble on THIS and THIS while googling for spandex based wank sites and huge cock comics.

Oh well, happy birthday to my blog!

Shopping list

I have piles of comics to read at the moment, but that won't stop me buying more this Thursday. Here's what I'll be shoveling into the old nerd sack..

Umbrella Academy Apocalypse Suite #6 (Of 6)
The first couple of issues in this series were excellent, but #3 and #4 were garbled and poorly paced. I haven't read #5 yet, but perhaps the whole thing will work when read as a whole. If not I can still get a few quid selling the set + Free comic book day prelude to some EMO kid on e-bay.

Checkmate #23
Reading Green Lantern and Green Lantern Corps from start to finish has been rewarding, I get the feeling that sitting down and doing the same with Checkmate would be a good idea too. This is one of my favourite books, but there's so much going on that digesting it in short monthly bursts can be difficult. I want to support the book though, so I'll keep buying the floppies instead of the trades.

Amazing Spider-Man #551
After two ssues of the Guggenheim/Larocca triptic, it's clear that they aren't as good a match for this title as Slott and McNiven. I'm still enjoying the book though. It's a better read than Ultimate Spider-Man at the moment and I may drop the latter as a result, after all who needs two regular Spider titles in their life?

The Order #8

I'm a few issues behind on this, but I know it's good. Sadly it's also been cancelled. Baw bags.

Ultimate Human #2 (of 4)

OK so this is only there to be released in trade paperback format in time for the new Hulk and Iron Man movies, but unlike other blatant movie cash-ins (I'm looking at you Spider-Man v Doc Oc and Silver Surfer Requiem) this is actually good. Warren Ellis and Cary Nord are a shit hot team who, if issue #1 is anyhting to go by, are going to serve us up some good wholesome gamma on iron action.

Jenna Jamesons Shadow Hunter #1

Porno sword and sorcery shenanigans. KERCHING! No lame jokes about the fact that it's being published by Virgin, I promise.

Last Orders

The Irredeemable Ant-Man, Exterminators and now The Order. Yes, as of issue #10, another of my favourite books is getting the chop.

Obviously Marvel feel that The Order isn't selling well enough to justify an extended run, but it can't be healthy to keep cancelling comics that have barely got into their stride. After all why should I continue to part with my cash for titles that have little or no chance of avoiding the chop? And what chance do any new comics have if people like me stop buying them?

Yes there'll always be Superman, Batman, Spidey, the Fantastic Four and the X-Men, but outside of those mainstays precious little is making it beyond issue 20. I guess Checkmate at DC is getting a decent crack of the whip despite less than impressive sales, but that probably has something to do with Greg Rucka. I imagine the book would be canned if he weren't such an influential figure. It might still be axed now that he's no longer exclusive to DC.

Very few other new ongoing titles get a chance at the big two. What we're left with is a raft of mini-series, often cynically timed to coincide with the release of new superhero movies and a bunch of over-hyped event linked books.

I suppose I shouldn't grumble. The established titles are the ones that make the money. If the Order and Ant-Man aren't making any dough then it's no surprise that they get cancelled. Surely DC and Marvel realise that these titles aren't going to sell in huge numbers though, which begs the question: "why are they soliciting them as ongoing series in the first place?"

If they had set Ant-Man up as a 12 issue mini series I wouldn't have felt like I'd wasted £24 at the end of the run! And if overall sales of the book had been better than expected they could just have solicited another 12 issues.

If they do insist on selling these titles as ongoing series, then they should be willing to stick with them for a reasonable amount of time. Their refusal to do so leaves me feeling more convinced than ever that I'm wasting my time buying single issues that have little or no chance of survival in an industry which is geared towards trade paperbacks and the cross promotion of big budget movies.

Catching up

Greetings. I haven't seen a mouse in almost 24 hours and, as a result, I feel relaxed enough to bring you not one, but two week's worth of comic reviews. You lucky people.

Let's start with the worst stuff first: Thor #1. I was looking forward to this a lot. Sadly it was a let down. That's not to say that it was a terrible comic, just that it was OK, and when you're dealing with something as big as the relaunch of Thor, OK isn't good enough.

A comic about a Norse God turned superhero should be big on WOW! and low on pathos. I accept that the scene needs to be set for the new run, but it would've been nice to have a bit more action and a lot less of Donald Blake chatting to the landlady of a desert motel about nothing. I'll probably pick up issue two, but I'll need to see a major increase in hammer wielding shenanigans to stay on board for the long haul.

If you are going to do a superhero comic with a low violence quota, you better make sure it's heavy on ideas. Thor doesn't do that, but All Star Superman does.

Grant Morrison is an ideas man of course, and that makes him the perfect writer for a book which owes a lot to the whacked out world of silver age Supes. His vision is only part of the story though. The book wouldn't succeed half as well as it does were it not for the art.

I'm not just talking about Frank Quitely's drawing either. It's Jamie Grant's colours that really make the book sing. From the blood red skies of Bizarro world to the greeny grey skins of the Bizarros themselves, every panel of this book has been coloured to perfection. It looks like a multi-million dollar cartoon and is truly different to anything else in mainstream comics. Take it from me, this comic is a real pleasure.

As is Green Lantern #21, a book which I mentioned earlier this week because of the fact that it referenced a 1980's Alan Moore story. Stuff like that is automatically going to get me onside, but the truth is I would have enjoyed this even without the 80's fan boy moment.

I'm as tired of event driven crossover comics as the next nerd, but this Sinestro Corps storyline seems to be a big excuse for lots of cool looking aliens to fight each other to the death in space, and if you can't enjoy that then superhero comics really aren't for you.

This issue wasn't as good as the King size Sinestro Corps special which kicked the whole thing off (not enough of Sinestro himself and I miss the Ethan Van Sciver art that made the special look so errr SPECIAL), but there were still enough big moments to get me exited about the next chapter.

I also enjoyed Detective Comics #834, (although not quite as much as the first part of this two-parter which featured a nice little surprise ending), and Outsiders #49 which wraps up the recent crossover with Checkmate.

Checkout (see what they did there?) was an exciting story which I hope will see a few Outsiders readers coming on board Checkmate fulltime.

Best thing about the crossover? The sadistic Doctor Chang, a cyber Humpty Dumpty who feels a bit like a DC version of MODOK.

Look forward to seeing him again. We need more malevolent eggs in comics...

Mwahahahahahaha!

Other than the DC stuff, I've been enjoying Robert Kirkman's work for Image comics this week. The good folk at Amazon were kind enough to ship me out the latest Invincible trade: My Favourite Martian, and I was delighted to see that issue #2 of The Astounding Wolf-Man had also hit the shops.

Invincible is as slick and well paced as the previous seven volumes in the series. Still poking gentle fun at the superhero genre and all it's cliches while revelling in the things that make American comics such fun to read when they're done well.

I'm pleased to say that Astounding Wolf-Man looks like it will be similarly enjoyable. There's a nice little twist at the end of the latest issue and a natty little cameo from one of the minor characters from Invincible which was a nice touch.

Given that another of Kirkman's creations Brit also pops up in the Invincible trade, it's becoming clear that he's building his own Universe over at Image. That's just as well, because (with the exception of The Irredeemable Ant-Man) he's more comfortable when he's working outside the confines of the Marvel U.

While Marvel aren't going to let him invent a raft of new characters, I can't help feeling that Kirkman is wasted trotting out Ultimate X-Men and Marvel Team-Up stories which don't allow him the freedom which is so evident in his creator owned Image books. He clearly isn't going to be leaving Marvel anytime soon, but long term I think we'll continue to see his best work in his own comics.

Elsewhere this week I enjoyed Midnighter #9, the last of an impressive series of fill-in issues penned and pencilled by some of the industries top creators before Keith Giffen and Chris Sprouse take over permanently next month.

I thought that maybe Justin Gray and Jimmy Palmiotti didn't quite capture The Midnighter's voice as well as some of their predecessors on the title, but they still managed to produce a decent short story.

Spider-Man and the Fantastic Four #3 was excellent, Omega Flight #4 is average and The Transformations of Jimmy Olsen trade which I mentioned yesterday is AWESOME. I'm still reading it and I'm sure I'll post something else about it soon.

The Weekly Shop #9

None of the shops I checked yesterday had Ninjas v Pirates. No matter, I still managed to pick up a shitload of other titles on Free Comic Book day including Gumby, who (while not quite as awesome as a ninja) does take on some pirates...

I'll be passing Gumby and the other kid friendly comics onto a pal with children. Hopefully they'll hook his nippers on comics, thereby allowing me to feel I've done my little bit to ensure the survival of the medium.

Orbital had the free comic book day titles prominently displayed, but I was disappointed to see that the other three West End comic shops (Forbidden Planet, Gosh and Comicana) weren't making a big deal of the event.

Forbidden Planet's lack of publicity was particularly galling. The shop was full of kids buying Doctor Who goodies, yet no-one was handing out free comics. In fact I had to go to the comic book counter and ask if they were participating in Free Comic Book Day at all.

They were, but NONE of the free stuff had been put on display and only those people who asked for free comics got them. How stupid. Think how many of those kids buying their Cyber helmets and remote controlled daleks could've been plugged into comics with just a little bit of proactivity.

Gosh also had a box behind the counter. To be fair to them they don't have the floorspace that FP have so their lack of a display was more understandable.

At least they had some of the official free comics which is more than can be said for Comicana who had just put together some bags of shitty old stuff, one of which was being given to every customer who bought something. I got some tatty 90's crap and a four year old copy of Wizard. Woo fucking hoo. That little lot would be enough to turn any kid off comics for life.

Anyway forget the kids, what about me? Well Comicana's crappy offering aside, I managed to get myself a sweeeeeet free stash of funny books.

Haven't made much headway with it yet, but did read Kirkman's Wolf-Man straight off the bat. It's a solid first issue with some dynamic looking art from Jason Howard who has penciled, inked and coloured the book. Looks a lot like Invincible and, in common with that book, I get the feeling that it might take a little while to get going. It has potential though.

As nice as the free stuff is, the kids will eventually have to learn that real comic goodness still costs money. Of the stuff I bought one book stands head and shoulders above the rest: Midnighter #7

Finding out that Garth Ennis wasn't writing this issue was a bit of a shock, but hey if you're going to get a fill-in writer I suppose there are shabbier choices out there than Brian K Vaughan.

Ably assisted by Darick Robertson, Vaughan has penned a high octane one off story which gives us a glimpse into the world of The Midnighter (a man who knows what's coming next) by running his latest adventure backwards.

What we get is a cross between Time's Arrow and Die Hard. It works well and rewards a rapid reread from back to front.

Love Robertson's cyber goons, he's clearly used some of the early Dave Gibbons art from 2000AD's Harlem Heroes as an inspiration...


As a Harlem Heroes nut I appreciated the nod.

Detective comics #832 also has a fill-in writer on duty this month.

The oddly named Royal McGraw might not have the reputation of Vaughan or indeed the man he's covering for, Paul Dini. But I enjoyed his Return of Doctor Phosphorus story in #825 and his latest outing, (which has Batman hunting down a killer who has targeted old school villains and Dini favourites The Terrible Trio), is a a tightly wrapped little story from a writer who I'd be happy to see getting more regular work.

Checkmate#13 was another great issue. I listened to Greg Rucka being interviewed by John Siuntres on the excellent Wordballoon podcast the other night, a show in which Rucka revealed he doesn't bother looking at the falling sales figures on Checkmate anymore for fear that they would depress him into giving up.

While the crossover with the Outsiders which begins this issue is hardly likely to bring many new readers on board, I prey that something changes, because I'd be gutted to lose this book from my monthly shop.

As I've said before though, the fact that Forbidden Planet had knocked £2 off the price of the first trade within a week of its release does not bode well for the future.

Its doubtful whether the market could sustain a regular monthly Omega Flight book either, but I'm sure we'll make it to the end of the current five part mini-series. Issue 2 came out this week and must rank as one of the most sound-effect laden comics of all time. That's not a bad thing, it gives the comic a nice knockabout feel. There's nothing heavy or adult about this book, it's just an enjoyable piece of B list Superhero fun and I like it a lot.

Which is more than can be said for the latest issue of Ultimate Fantastic Four. I'm still struggling to enjoy this book since Mark Millar finished with it.

While the latest three part arc started off promisingly enough, it fizzled out pretty quickly and I speed read this month's conclusion. I'll probably pick up the next arc to see what Carey and Kolins do with the Ultimate Silver Surfer, but I might be dropping this book soon after.

British comics purchased this week (other than that huge and unnecessary run of 80's Eagle I mentioned yesterday) were 2000AD #1535 and Judge Dredd megazine #258.

Was somewhat baffled by the second parts of the Blood of Satanus and Judge Anderson stories in the megazine, but enjoyed Robbie Morrison's Judge Dredd meets The Wire story "Streetfighting man".

I'm a bit scared of artist Henry Flint's take on Judge Dredd's chin though...

Come on, that's not a chin its a goitre

The best thing about the megazine is the inclusion of two Angel Gang stories, the second of which features Mean Machine headbutting a surprised triceratops...

what with this and another alien dinosaur packed episode of Detonator X in 2000AD, I've had my fill of man v dinosaur action for the week, which is just as well as I was SORELY tempted to lash more of my hard earned on this...


"On an unnamed, uncharted Pacific island, dinosaurs continued to thrive while World War II raged across the globe. It's there that members of the U.S. Military found themselves armed only with standard-issue weapons against the deadliest predators ever to roam the Earth"

It's only a matter of time before I cave in on this one folks, only a matter of time.

The weekly shop #3

Well what a fine Thursday that was: A day off work, some new comics and a night on the sauce with old friends Dave F, Ben W and Rayne P.

I feel like shit today of course, further proof that while my mind continues to regress, my body is steadfastly refusing to come along for the ride.

Enough about my inevitable decline though and onto this week's comics...

Captain America #25

Two weeks after it came out I finally got my hands on Captain America #25 and even though I was roaring drunk when I read it I could still see a damn fine superhero comic through the haze.

In fact if it really is the end for Steve Rogers then this issue stands as an excellent epitaph. It's crammed full of flashbacks for the fanboys to get excited about (THE INVADERS! OH WE LIKE THE INVADERS! GIVE US AN INVADERS BOOK MARVEL, GIVE IT TO US NOW!) , it's got some top notch action sequences and it left me feeling perfectly happy with the notion that Steve Rogers might really be dead after all.

The death scene itself is brilliantly done, (echoes of the assassination of both JFK and Lee Harvey Oswald in there methinks), and the last page should get a fair whack of the people who only hopped on board this issue coming back for more.

That's down to Ed Brubaker of course, a top quality comics writer who I’m sure will do as fine a job from here on in as he did with the first 25 issues. Whoever gets to be Cap, with Brubaker in charge it’ll be done well.

PS As much as I hate the evil of variant covers, I admit to buying both on this occasion. Not because I think they'll be worth fortunes but because I genuinely liked them. In fact the McGuinness variant goes down as my favourite cover of the year so far...

Cap comin' atcha!

Checkmate #12

It's obvious that I'm a Marvel zombie at heart, but DC do have several titles that float my boat, and there aren't many monthlies I look forward to more than Checkmate.

This is a book which demands concentration and hence made no sense to me on my drunken bus journey home last night. I reread it today though and thought it was excellent. Two issues into the new arc and the blend of espionage and superhero shenanigans is working better than ever.

As per usual I had to return to the previous issue and flip back and forth in the current one to get my head round the various twists and turns. But that's cool, I like comics that require a bit of effort and anyway there's still enough fighting in this book to keep me happy.

This issue deserves special mention for the appearance of Bane, a character who is most famous for breaking Batman’s back a decade ago. Like a lot of 1990's comic book villains he has a tiny head which is totally out of proportion to his HUGE body.

That combination leaves him looking slightly out of place in a savvy 21st century espionage comic, but I like the fact that Greg Rucka and co aren't afraid to embrace the 90's, and got a kick out of seeing Bane again.

Attack of the 1990’s

Shadowpact Volume one: The Pentacle Plot

Holy crap two DC books in a week. May Galactus strike me down, I feel like a traitor to the House of Ideas!

I certainly never envisaged buying any comic with the Blue Devil in it, even as a kid I remember realising that he was lame. I Blame Checkmate. Shadowpact guest starred in the last arc of that book and got me curious enough about the characters to pick up this trade.

I've only read 20 pages or so, but it looks OK. It's by Bill Willingham of Fables fame so it's probably half decent. I'm still not happy reading a book with Blue Devil in it, but I'm sure his inherent lameness will be counteracted by the presence of Detective Chimp. I'm yet to meet a talking monkey I didn't like.

Talking monkeys punching people. Yay, I just peed my pants!