If comic shops were
KFCs, Marvel Essentials would be bargain buckets. Cooked up using The House of Ideas' Secret Recipe, these cheap black and white bricks are the value purchase for hungry comic historians.
Every volume retails for around a tenner or less and they all reprint 20+ classic issues. I've gorged myself on quite a few down the years and still have plenty sitting on my shelves which I've only dipped into.
They're all tasty, but my favourite flavour is undoubtedly
Essential Super-Villain Team-Up Volume #1.
It's a mighty tome collecting stories from 30 different comics and featuring art from the likes of Wally Wood, Gene Colan, John
Buscema,
Herbe Trimpe, George Perez and Carmine
Infantino.
While a galaxy of
Marvel's greatest villains appear in the book, Doctor Doom is the anchor point. He appears in all the stories and rightly so - I think we can all agree that bad guys don't come much more A list than Doom. OK, so perhaps the Joker or
Lex Luthor are a rung or two ahead of him on the ladder of villainy, but in Marvel terms? Nah...Doom is
THE man.
Being a high ranking villain, our boy doesn't get much time to kick back and relax. Taking over the World is a 24-7, 365 days a year kind of job. And don't forget, while he's working his steel balls off to bring the rule of Doom to rest of the planet, Victor still has to keep a tight reign on his own country,
Latveria.
As anyone who has read Essential Super-Villain Team-Up will know, that's not as easy as it sounds. Some super-powered Z
lister or
wanabee monarch is
ALWAYS trying to get their hands on the peaceful principality.
Take this knob for example...
Rightful ruler my arse. Prince Rudolfo is a whining loser who is still bitter that his father was too weak to stop Doom taking over his crummy country in the first place.
Like father like son: Rudolfo soon gets shafted when Doom tricks him and his bitch ass disciples into thinking they have taken over Castle Doom.
Just as the foppish pretender is settling in to life in the throne room, Doom activates a vibration machine that demolishes the castle and sends Rudolfo running for the hills like the sissy he is. Ha-Ha. Owned!
It's another easy victory for Doom, but one which leaves him temporarily homeless. Thankfully a heartfelt appeal on national television touches the hearts and minds of
Latverians everywhere...
The populace are soon
queuing up to offer their help in rebuilding the Royal residence...
No need to be so down folks, the ever benevolent Doom has already done all the planning leaving you
Latverians with the relatively simple task of rebuilding Castle Doom.
With things well in hand, Doom decides against holing up in a
Latverian B&B and instead jets off for a well earned mini-break in the South of France.
Notice how light he packs, just the armour and a gun.
This is Doom's first holiday for many years and you get the feeling he finds it hard to let his hair down. I mean there aren't many nicer spots in the world for an eligible young monarch to hang out than the French Riviera, yet Doom can't get out of super-villain mode and chooses to shun flip-flops, shorts and a relaxing cocktail by the pool for a stroll down the beach in his armour...
Pausing from his righteous railing against the pampered aristocracy of Western Europe, Doom checks into the Riviera's top hotel. He isn't expected, but the staff are only too happy to free up a room for such an esteemed guest.
Pack your bags Queen Elizabeth, Doom is in town...
Sadly he's clocked by a couple of unscrupulous locals...
...who wait until nightfall to don their burglar outfits (a small mask in the case of the clever one, a full on spandex number for the muscles) and attempt to rob the
jet lagged Doom
This
lunk is clearly deluded. Selling Doom's armour on the open market would be impossible. He might be able to get rid of it on the quiet by selling it to some rich private collector like Superman or Batman both of whom are known to collect Super-Villain curios. But the open market? No way. Doom would be on his case before the auctioneer's hammer hit the gavel.
Not that he gets anywhere near the armour anyway.
Aaahh look at
Doomy all tucked up in his
pyjarmour. What a cutie. But he's not just a pretty face as our foolish burglar soon finds out
ZZIRRRR! Eat
Repulsor ray
shithead! And get the fuck out of Doom's room...
That deals with the crooks, but after such a
rudely interrupted night's sleep it's no
surprise that Doom is a bit cranky at breakfast the next morning...
What's the matter with these people? Haven't they ever seen a man in full battle armour at the breakfast table?
Doom's mood is made even worse when the gimps at the local casino get antsy about him letting his hair down at the roulette table...
What impudence! Victor wouldn't take that kind of shit from Magneto or Prince
Namor let alone these two simpering swines. You can't blame him for throwing a
Doomtrum.
It's a sad conclusion to the holiday, but after being gaped at by clods, attacked in his own room and refused the chance to partake in a little nightlife is it any wonder that Doom decides enough is enough and checks out?
And so ends a brief break in the sun for Earth's number #1 super-monarch. When he returns to
Latveria he finds that the Red Skull has mounted a takeover and that his helpless subjects are all marching about in jackboots and talking German.
The ensuing battle between Doom and the Skull is a jaw dropper. One day LLC shall document it. For now it is enough to know that Doom wins again. As long as he's not fighting Super-heroes he always does.
All panels taken from
Essential Super-Villain Team Up Volume #1. Originally printed in
Astonishing Tales #1, #3 and
#4.
Seriously, as someone who has the word MODOK in their e-mail address you need to buy this. For a first issue it's practically flawless. There's a brief retelling of MODOK's origin and then its straight into the mind of old big head with this complex series of calculations...
an equation which in its purest essence boils down to this...
Perfect. You see MODOK needs to get a gang together to steal the cosmic cube...
Impenetrable fortress? Fearsome Weapon? Tough job. You'll need the likes of Magneto and Doom to crack this one right?
+
=
Along with him we get the likes of Puma!
I can has cheezburger?
Didn't you used to do backing vocals for Prince?
Pink super-villain = lame super-villain
Not
I bought a shitload of comics this week and this is the best hands down. It even comes with a potted one page history of the great one. A history which contains this little known panel from MODOK's past (click the image for an important message)...
I am already slobbering in anticipation of Issue #2.
It's a mighty tome collecting stories from 30 different comics and featuring art from the likes of Wally Wood, Gene Colan, John Buscema, Herbe Trimpe, George Perez and Carmine Infantino.
Rightful ruler my arse. Prince Rudolfo is a whining loser who is still bitter that his father was too weak to stop Doom taking over his crummy country in the first place.
The populace are soon queuing up to offer their help in rebuilding the Royal residence...
Notice how light he packs, just the armour and a gun.
Pausing from his righteous railing against the pampered aristocracy of Western Europe, Doom checks into the Riviera's top hotel. He isn't expected, but the staff are only too happy to free up a room for such an esteemed guest.
Sadly he's clocked by a couple of unscrupulous locals...
...who wait until nightfall to don their burglar outfits (a small mask in the case of the clever one, a full on spandex number for the muscles) and attempt to rob the jet lagged Doom
Aaahh look at Doomy all tucked up in his pyjarmour. What a cutie. But he's not just a pretty face as our foolish burglar soon finds out
That deals with the crooks, but after such a rudely interrupted night's sleep it's no surprise that Doom is a bit cranky at breakfast the next morning...
What's the matter with these people? Haven't they ever seen a man in full battle armour at the breakfast table?
What impudence! Victor wouldn't take that kind of shit from Magneto or Prince Namor let alone these two simpering swines. You can't blame him for throwing a Doomtrum.
It's a sad conclusion to the holiday, but after being gaped at by clods, attacked in his own room and refused the chance to partake in a little nightlife is it any wonder that Doom decides enough is enough and checks out?
And so ends a brief break in the sun for Earth's number #1 super-monarch. When he returns to Latveria he finds that the Red Skull has mounted a takeover and that his helpless subjects are all marching about in jackboots and talking German.
