Wednesday, 17 February 2010

Shopping List

You are surrounded by unread comics. You have little or no time in which to read them. When there is time, you find yourself unable to keep your eyes open. Thursday is approaching. Do you:

Admit that your single issue habit is no longer viable and switch to trades (turn to 85)
Fill up on coffee and stay awake reading, until the backlog of brightly coloured tat is no more (turn to 101)
Ignore the teetering mountains of never-to-be-read bilge and make your way to the comic shop to fill your nerd sack with more expensive goodies (turn to 232)

Ignoring the feelings of guilt and self-loathing, you compile your shopping list and prepare to board the bus to the west end of the city. Deduct 2 stamina and turn to 73.

Glancing at your shopping list you note that you are no longer bothering to buy Astounding Wolf-Man or any of the Superman titles, add 1 to your luck. Your shopping list looks like this:

Blackest Night The Flash #3
Blackest Night Green Lantern #51
Blackest Night Green Lantern Corps #45
Joe The Barbarian #2
Captain America #603
Doctor Voodoo Avenger Of The Supernatural #5
Punisher #14

You are are keen to read Joe The Barbarian and The Punisher. You can't remember what is happening in any of The Blackest Night stuff. You buy it anyway.
On your way home you bump into your missus. Test your luck. If you are lucky turn to 86. If you are unlucky turn to 97.

You try to conceal your nerd sack, but you are not fast enough! Your missus is enraged that you are bringing more expensive tat back to the house. You try to tell her that you will be selling some of the old stuff on ebay, but she will not listen and attacks. You must defend yourself.

Your Missus: Skill 13 Stamina 12

You may escape this encounter at any point by promising to donate one third of your comics to charity. If you wish to do this deduct half your remaining stamina and return to 1.


Anonymous said...

Fucking fantastic.... Hilarious...
You should do a whole book Dom.
Im loving that shit!

Dom Sutton said...

ah, glad you got a giggle out of it Dave. When's the next quiz?

pulpsfromthebothy said...

I think I lose loads of points, found this so funny that I sent the link to the lovely Mrs.K (that being my long suffering other half)

mrgroo said...

I've found the solution to this dilemma. Tell yourself you've given up and don't read any for months. Then catch up all in one go and realise why you should never ever stop buying the piles of overpriced boy-tat. Also helps to actually work out what the *&%$ is going on in the stories, rather than read a tiny bit every month. I mean who picks up a book, reads a chapter and then thinks 'oooh I really fancy reading the next bit in about a month's time'?

Anonymous said...

Next Quiz... Well... We could wait until the Greenmans done with re-furb which will be several months...or Pillars of Hercules (apt name) just of Cambridge Circus in an affiliate pub whose buxom landlady has expressed a kean interest in my.... quizzes.
Only snagette, I will need to get nerds aplenty if Im to persuade her its a viable thing... Hmmm...

Mr A. P. Salmond, esq. said...

That was brilliant! Very nicw start to the day. Dave, we could plug the quiz on the Gosh blog if you like.

Jared said...