Big Dave F talks Rulk

I said I'd write something about Red Hulk, but the moment got away from me. Fortunately, my good friend Dave F has emailed me his thoughts on the latest incarnation of his favourite character.

I've posted some of Dave's Hulk related gubbins before, but I feel that I should preface this latest effort by reminding you that Dave really, really, REALLY loves The Hulk. People think I'm joking when I tell them that he's spent the best part of his adult life trying to turn into Lewisham's equivalent of the gamma-irradiated freak, but honestly, I'm not. Here's the picture that proves the point...

He's a lovely fellah, but you wouldn't want to make him angry.

Anyway, I digress. A quick shot of Rulk, and the virtual floor is all yours my steroid chomping chum...

"Okay, okay… Red Hulk reviews… Looks like I better step up to the plate.

Every muggy bonehead tried telling me: Dave we don’t like intelligent Hulk. Dave we like old Hulk. Dave we like Hulk smash! If indeed we like Hulk at all…. (which many of you don’t… I understand and accept that… You stupid fucking tossers!)

Well…. Yeah… Truth be known so do I. Dave like old Hulk. But if you like ice cream you don’t condemn a new flavour until you’ve tried it… Hmmm Cherry flavoured Hulk. Fuck Yeah… From the moment I read the first comic I knew it was gonna be a total no-brainer.

What a reinvention! Rick Jones as a weird new Abomination?! Hulk using guns?! Not knowing if Red Hulk really was Banner?! (I mean the Hulk has been split into multiple manifests many times before) Could I accept this?

I don’t condone violence against women, but that Art Adams splash of Red Hulk hitting She-Hulk so hard her tits look like the’re gonna explode...well, I knew this was the comic for me. And fear not true believers the things we know and love are still happening: Ol Walrus face Ross is still pulling out his grey hair, Doc Samson is still the jealous little ‘I wanna be as strong as the hulk’ guy, Banner is still the troubled physicist, and green Hulk is back to being his lovely childlike self. But true to the best vintage Hulk comics, everyone and I mean everyone is throwing themselves at the Red Hulk (Just like they used to do at the green Hulk)… A king sized smash fest in almost every issue! Aaaah, nostalgia… I could almost smell the mouldy back issues from LTS.

Very, very silly moments ensue from issues 1-12, but they are priceless moments. Moments that have you saying: can they really do that? What the fuck! Oh come on!

I must admit I nearly tore the comic in two when Red Hulk broke green Hulk's arm and choked him unconscious. But I read on and have come to believe that Red Hulk has gotta be one of the best things to come out of Marvel in a long time.

Knocking out the Watcher. Beheading Terrax. Breaking Silver Surfer's neck. Yes, these things actually happen…

Oh Yeah and the Ultimate Wolverine vs. Hulk series has finally been concluded.

Was it good?: Quite

Was it worth waiting 3 years for?: No

Nothing is worth waiting 3 years for unless it turns up, apologises, take off its clothes, (bar the red stilettos), and then sucks your cock like it's suffocating and your balls are full of oxygen…"

There you go, London Loves Comics: first for all your mildly misogynistic, Hulk related fetishes.

Thanks for the email Dave.

Deer, Deer

I know, I know - Red Hulk is "turn-your-brain-off-comics" cranked up to 11, but I don't care, it's flipping ACE!

Here's one of my favourite sequences...

which caused me to nerdgasm, because it's an homage to one of the greatest Hulk panels ever...

I am still battling the lurgy, but soon I shall be restored to full fitness, and then I shall bore you all with more in depth Red Hulk wittering. Mwahahahahaha!

Scans from King Size Hulk #1 and Hulk Visionairies: John Byrne

Hulk 911

I belong to the Merry Marvel Thieving Society

I've been reading Manga.

There, I said it, sorry.

Naoki Urasawa's Monster to be more precise. Why? Well, I was in Gosh! getting my weekly fix and itching to spend more of my hard earned comic cash. Eschewing those pretty Showcases and Essentials, my mind strayed to an old episode of Around Comics in which someone or other (hope you're appreciating the specifics here) recommended Monster. Before you know it I'm shambling my way down to the Manga lined basement and grabbing some honest to goodness manga. Blimey.

I had no idea that Monster was a sprawling epic that runs to 18 volumes. Sadly after reading volume #1 I'm going to have to lay out more wedge on the remaining books. It's not that it's a particularly amazing piece of comics brilliance or anything, (I kept hearing Miriam Margolyes and Andrew Sachs in my head as I read the rather clunky English translation), but it is a page turner. A bit like an airport novel, very readable trash.

The plot centres around a young Japanese brain surgeon working in a German hospital who saves the life of a boy who turns out to be a psychopath. There's plenty of suspense, a nice (if somewhat hard to believe) look at hospital politics and some interesting characters.

The pictures are also very pretty. There's only one Japanese character in the story and it's interesting to see European characters drawn in the Manga style. Apparently Westerners all have huge noses.

Anyway - well worth a look if you fancy a fun, easy read on the bus to work.

*************************************************************************************

Finally got round to reading a bit of Back Issue #24. As always, there's a fair bit of filler to plough through, but buried in amongst some of the less interesting stuff there's a nice interview with Gene Colan about his run on Dr. Strange. It turns out that Colan based his Strange on a bunch of old photos he had of Mikhail Baryshnikov. There's one in the eye for all those folk out there who knock the likes of Greg Land for ripping off his art from magazines.

*************************************************************************************

I've been thieving. Terrible I know, but I was thumbing through the display copy of The Marvel Vault in Borders and was unable to resist the temptation to pocket this...
Gahh, it's only a sticker for Christ's sake. No-one's going to miss it and they'll only bin the display copy in a few months anyway. I might go back tomorrow and pinch The Thing Christmas Card.

*************************************************************************************

Not that I'm obsessed with Nazis or anything, but when I saw the magnificently titled I Killed Adolf Hitler in Gosh, it was obvious that I'd be slipping it into my nerd sack.

Travelling back in time to kill Hitler is a well worn subject in comics, (see Midnighter and Strontium Dog for famous examples), but it's never been done like this...

Top stuff. Highly recommended.

*************************************************************************************

That man Dave F has been filling my inbox again. Here's his latest offering...

"Blimey! You thought you’d never see the day when Big D posted something that wasn’t Hulk related. Well I just love this panel and had to share it with the world

When your 12 year old friend ‘Sticks’ goes ‘a missing, I think it’s a fairly safe bet that its gonna have something to do with the wild eyed hillbilly who wears dungarees and makes scarecrows in his spare time… Whadda you think true believers?

And while I'm here please let me treat you to another of my all time fave comic covers from the 70s…. Ooooh now I know Absorbing Man has never been 100 ft tall in any of his incarnations, but I was under 10 years old when I first saw this….

Aaah what magic nostalgia!

Anyone ever read this?

I've never been too bothered what Baker gets up to in his spare time,(unless its screwdrivering Cybermen) and when he shunned his Whovian heritage in the late 80s I boycotted him… Fuckin cunt!

DAVE SMASH!!!!!!!

But he endeared himself to me again when I had a chance meeting with him on Cecil Court. Took me a while to track this bloody book down though, and…. I rather liked it. Baker is a funny man and it shines through in his autobiography. Although not smeared with it, there is a healthy sprinkling of Who related history in there for the discerning fan. I mean come on! He has portrayed himself as the Doctor on the cover and history cant be erased can it Tom? Even a Time Lord knows that…. Or can it? You know I can’t fuckin remember actually. Answers on a postcard please!"

Thanks Dave.

Attention Hulk fans

Regular LLC readers have of course been introduced to my good friend Dave F, a man who loves the Hulk so much that he took huge amounts of steroids and overdosed on mushy peas for a number of years.

From time to time this raging 'roid gobbler sends me e-mails about his beloved Hulk. I have recently received one such piece of correspondence celebrating the joys of Ultimate Hulk.

Now I know Dave hates the idea of an intelligent Hulk. Like me he believes the thinking should be left to Bruce Banner. Hulk is there to smash and witter on like a retarded child while he's at it...

For this reason I felt the Hulk portrayed in the early issues of Millar and Hitch's run on The Ultimates would be right up Dave's alley and recommended that he take a look. It seems he has been enjoying Ultimate Hulk more than I imagined. He's even gone to the extreme length of reading Ultimate Wolverine v Hulk and recently phoned me to explain in graphic detail a scene where Hulk rips Wolverine in two - a scenario which clearly gave him the comic horn.

Anyway enough of my blabbering, here are Dave F's latest thoughts on the Jade Giant. Take it away Big Fella...

"Hi Hulkamaniacs…. Oooh no. Too WWF.

Hi Hulkophiles…. Hmmm…Too Gary Glitter

Hi Hulkanatics!?! Too Bollocks!

Hi Hulk fans and all round lovers of comic based shenanigans! (Works for me)

Big D again.

Okay, I dipped my proverbial comic toe into the Marvel Ultimates. What I found made me weep blood and piss Magners. I will quote Dom here: “You will like Ultimate Hulk. He is a very pure character…” He wasn’t fuckin' wid me either. Please have a nerdgasm over the splash which assaulted my senses on pages 2 & 3 of Ultimate Wolverine vs. Hulk

Look I'll admit it in this blog, but ever mention it again and I'll dislocate your limbs and dunk you in a fast flowing river….. I was so excited by these publications, I got out my action figures and struck some serious poses...

Okay, here’s the rub: six issues were commissioned. Only 2 got published. We’re talking 2005 here. After much research, I discovered that the Ultimate Wolverine vs. Hulk project is on hiatus. One of the writers defected to the TV series ‘Lost’, and a whole host of production issues plagued this series. Sometime in2008 is the loose date Marvel officials have given regarding its completion… FUCK! Ill have to wait till I'm 36 before I find out what happens in the next 4 issues?!? DAVE SMASH!

One thing you cant deny though is the luscious artwork of Lenil Francis Yu in these publications. Gawd bless ‘im, makes it worth the wait...

Now that’s a whole lotta Hulk to love!"

*************************************************************************************

Also appearing in my inbox this week, Another link from Mr Wheatley. This one is sehr gut. CLICKEE

If any other readers want to send me stuff (I'm including you too Mr "Google search: Old man+spandex+fuck") please feel free. I'll post any old gubbins.

S'laterz!